Waiting patiently or Wasting your time

Waiting patiently or Wasting your time

10/19/2015
8:12 AM

There are many uncertainties that comes with being in a relationship the most common is not knowing the plans of your partner, if your partner is as enthusiastic about the relationship as you are in most cases you never can tell because like the old saying goes time will tell but them time is of the essence if we could have a little glimpse of the future in the past we wouldn't have made a lot of mistakes, but you see life does not come with a mystic ball which one can use to have a clear glimpse of the future.
I often read a lot of article advising women to stick with a guy with potential even if he is penniless, to be honest its not fun dating a broke guy it even gets worse when he dumps you the moment he gets financially stable, you will feel like a fool you will feel used a lot of women have found themselves in this situation then the "had I known" syndrome begins to clamp down on you, you start blaming your self thinking of a million things you should have done differently in most cases the man will look for an excuse or take advantage of a little mis understanding to end the relationship he will even give you a long list of all the things you have done wrong over the years but listen girl don't blame yourself just leave him and move on his Karma awaits him one thing is for sure it has now dawned on you that you have been wasting your time not waiting patiently and now you are being more careful.
I remember my university days, a friend of mine was in a relationship with this guy, she was in her 100 level while he was in his final year after the guy graduated and was through with his service year, he couldn't find a job he was so loyal to my friend always preaching his undying love for her telling her that when he finally makes it she wont be forgotten let me not bore you with this sad love story and go straight to the end years later thus guy relocated to the United States of America with the help of his sister who is is a residence over there, it was there that his true colors came to the surface, he wasn't broke any more, he did not need her for anything so he barely called, he kept giving excuses any reason why most women always say that a broke guy is a loyal dog well its because if experiences such as this, the guy never sent my friend a dollar he told her that she was not in his class that she didn't have a job and she was not an independent self made woman it was only later we got to find out that he was getting married to a Nigerian girl who is supposedly a working class in the USA  so much for being patient and sticking to a guy in hard times.
In scenarios like the one stated above the women are the ones affected because for a woman age matters when it comes to marriage. Let us use my friend above for a case study the relationship started when she was 19 it lasted for 6 years meaning she was 25 years so she wasted six years of her life while thinking she was patiently waiting.
She has just graduated and still searching for a job so in a way he was right when he said she is not a working class, think about the psychological effect of those words on a young woman who is trying to stand on her feet.
At 25 you don't expect her to patiently wait for the next guy she decides to date, you don't expect her to go into a relationship with a man who jobless or someone struggling to make ends meet no matter how hard working  he is, so while she is struggling to get a job and be a self made woman she is also hoping to go into a relationship with an already made man even if the judgemental society tags her the Materialistic kind if girl she does not give a damn.
As a man don't be offended if a girl turns you down because you don't have a job rather try and get one most women want to go into a relationship where there is some sort of financial security because no matter how independent a woman is she still needs a man she can depend on it is always satisfying for a woman to know that her man is financially capable this way she is relaxed.
Days are gone when a man will marry a 19 year old and see her through the university now most men want to marry a graduate while others want to marry a working class.
The world is evolving there are as much working class women as there are stay at home dads.
Don't waste your time thinking that you are waiting patiently don't stick to a broke guy hoping for some kind of reward or gratitude in the future.
Why not be in a relationship with the man you need instead of being in a relationship hoping the man will transform to what you need with time.
Onyejemuo Chidubem Ukamaka

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